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General Terms with Cool Definitions

Cigarette:A pinch of tobacco rolled in paper with fire at one end & a fool at the other.***********

Love affairs:Something like cricket where one-day internationals are more popular than a five-day test.***********

Marriage:It's an agreement in which a man loses his bachelor degree and a woman gains her master***********

Divorce:Future tense of marriage***********

Lecture:An art of transferring information from the notes of the lecturer to the notes of the students without passing through the minds of either.***********

Conference:The confusion of one man multiplied by the number present.***********

Compromise:The art of dividing a cake in such a way that everybody believes he got the biggest piece.***********

Tears:The hydraulic force by which masculine will power is defeated by feminine waterpower.. .***********

Dictionary:A place where divorce comes before marriage.***********

Conference Room:A place where everybody talks, nobody listens & everybody disagrees later on.***********

Ecstasy:A feeling when you feel you are going to feel a feeling you have never felt before.***********

Classic:A book which people praise, but do not read.***********

Smile:A curve that can set a lot of things straight.***********

Office:A place where you can relax after your strenuous home life.***********

Yawn:The only time some married men ever get to open their mouth.***********

Etc:A sign to make others believe that you know more than you actually do.***********

Committee:Individuals who can do nothing individually and sit to decide that nothing can be done together.***********

Experience:The name men give to their mistakes.***********

Atom Bomb:An invention to end all inventions.***********

Philosopher:A fool who torments himself during life, to be spoken of when dead.***********

Diplomat:A person who tells you to go to hell in such a way that you actually look forward to the trip.***********

Opportunist:A person who starts taking bath if he accidentally falls into a river.***********

Optimist:A person who while falling from Eiffel Tower says in midway See I am not injured yet.***********

Pessimist:A person who says that O is the last letter in ZERO, Instead of the first letter in word OPPORTUNITY**********

Miser:A person who lives poor so that he can die rich.***********

Father:A banker provided by nature.***********

Criminal:A guy no different from the rest... Except that he got caught.***********

Politician:One who shakes your hand before elections and your Confidence after.***********

Doctor:A person who kills your ills by pills, and kills you with his bills.***********

Boss: Someone who comes early when you are late and is late when you come early.***********

Classic:Books, which people praise but do not read.***********

Compromise: The art of dividing a cake that everybody believes he got the largest piece.***********

Committee:A group of individuals who can do nothing individually but sit to decide that nothing can be done together.***********

Conference:The confusion of one man multiplied by the number present.***********

Conference Room:A venue where everybody talks, nobody listens and everybody agrees later.***********

Dictionary:A place where pay, reward and success come before work.***********

Doctor:A medical person who kills your ills by pills and kills you with bills.***********

Etc.: A grammatical sign used to make people believe that you know more than you do.***********


Experience:The name men give to their mistakes.***********

Father: A banker provided by nature.***********

Lecture: The art of transferring information from the notes of the lecturer to that of the students without going through the brains of either.***********

Life Insurance: A contact that keeps you poor all your life so that you can be rich after.***********

Marriage:An agreement where a man loses his bachelor degree and a woman gains her masters. ***********

Nurse: A person who wakes you to give you sleeping pills.***********

Office: A place where you can relax after your strenuous homely life.***********

Philosopher: A man who torments himself all his life to become wise after death. ***********

Politician:Someone who shakes your hand before the elections and your confidence after.***********

Saturday and Sunday: Are strong days as the others are weak days (weekdays). ***********

School:A place where Papa pays and son plays.***********

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